about my disappearance

About my disappearance

By now, if you are local, you know that Kristin and I left Circle Acres. The reasons are deep and involve many differences in ideology, communication styles and lifestyle choices. My sobriety factors very heavily in this move as does my desire to be less accountable and responsible to an increasingly distant and foreign collective. A strong sense of misplaced entitlement pervades that place, which is something that I cannot support in any way. Living rent free while someone else carries the financial water is not anarchist, not friendly and not nice. The others may argue that this isn’t the case, but all I have to do is read through old emails and bank records to see how things went down,  get a glimpse of what should have been some serious red flags and see that I made many mistakes in making a path for this coddled land project.

At this point I have soured on the idea of collective living, understanding that anarchists tend to either thrive in that environment or find it too constrictive. As a very independent but collectively motivated individual, it is very hard for me to see the decision making process leave me behind. So we’ll move on, do our own thing and hope to remain decent with the larger spheres of community that we all populate. We may have wasted our time as part of Circle Acres, but regrets will never make us better people. The bitterness will fade as the freshness of it all moves along with the calendar, as new projects are presented and new people appear in our lives. As you encounter us in real life you may sense a bit of apprehension or distance; please be patient. No one can ever say that the two of us don’t work hard and get shit done.

Oh, and we are “city mice” once again…

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5 Responses to About my disappearance

  1. Ruffin says:

    Sorry to hear things ended like they did. Thanks for your work, and keep up the blogging.

  2. Aliza says:

    Have you ever read/heard of Drop City by T.C. Boyle? It’s one of my favorite books about collective living and all of the conflicts about freeloading, complex relationships, politics vs. fun, that you touched on in your post.

  3. Trace says:

    I haven’t heard of it, but I will look it up for sure.

    I did forget to mention that Kristin and I ceased having fun there a couple years ago while everyone else seemed to have nothing but fun. That surely took its toll on us, but in just the few days of being away from there our “personalities” are coming back.

  4. Patti says:

    Sounds like my ex-marriage. Watching the larger politics in the world, I’m wondering more if it’s just the nature of humans – the people willing to shoulder responsibility are taken advantage of by entitled types, both in personal relationships and in the business practices of corporations.

  5. Pingback: Things Fall Apart « wowed out

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